All I want is some cheap peanut butter.

I'm cheap.
I went to the grocery store to buy some peanut butter and jam. It is hard because everything has sugar, so I found the items that had the least amount of sugar and some bread. The store had a sign up saying that if you buy ten dollars additional you can get the peanut butter for one dollar and you can buy up to four of them.

Cool, I'm cheap so I can always stock up on peanut butter. Some I snatch a few more items to get over ten bucks. I go check out and the peanut butter rings up the full price of$1.77. I told the girl that they were a dollar and she that it can't count the peanut butter in that ten dollars. So I said ok. I wasn’t mad at all.

There was a line behind me so I was about to tell her I didn't want the peanut butter then when she asked for my driver’s license.
I said, "what?"
She said, "Give me your drivers license and I'll give you the discount."
Then I said, "Why do I need to do that?"
She said. "Do you want the discount?"
I said, "No."
She said ."So you don't want the discount?"
I said. "No, just take them off."

She looked shocked and frustrated at the same time about this and called the manager over to take it off. Well the manager was in one of my classes and remembered me and I told him that I didn't realize that I had to buy ten dollars over the peanut butter.
He said jokingly, "That's how we trick you."

He walked away and the girl looked worried. So I asked her what if I walked and didn't have a driver's license?
She said that it was a senior discount that she was going to give me.
I told her that I wasn't a senior citizen. And she said ok.
So here is the deal, she was going to count me as a senior citizen to get out of taking the peanut butter off. It turns out that I know the manager and she freaks out. I don't really have a point to this story except that it was weird. And I must look older than I thought.

Now I am the "old man" which is an old naval term for the "captain". I have to explain this in some of my classes when I have older people in them.

"I'm older then you and I feel older when you call yourself and old man."

"It's a navel term for the captain of a ship."

"Oh, I didn't know that, it's ok."

And all I wanted was some cheap peanut butter.